Kitchen Courtesy and Dishwasher Lessons

Let’s talk about kitchens in work situations.  We are fortunate to have kitchenettes in every department, but we are not fortunate enough to have many people with kitchen etiquette.  The kitchen in my office is only shared by 12 people and includes a full-size refrigerator, toaster oven, electric water kettle, dishwasher, coffee pot, and dishes and silverware. Plus housekeeping (or someone) supplies paper towels, dish soap and dishwasher soap.  We have it pretty good.  I just wish people would follow my kitchen rules, which I’m going to explain in case you are guilty of some of these.

1. When sharing a kitchen with others, clean up your messes.  You should leave the kitchen cleaner than you’d leave yours at home.  None of these people are your roommates, significant others, or parents – they didn’t sign up to clean up your shit.  There shouldn’t be splashes of soup or other liquids on the counter or in the microwave, and your food scraps shouldn’t be just hanging out in the sink when it’s perfectly easy to scrape them into the garbage disposal.
2. Share the fridge.  When you bring your lunch in, don’t just shove everyone else’s stuff to the back.  Slide things around to make yours fit without squishing people’s sandwiches (or in my case, my protein pancakes today).  I admit, I take up more space in the fridge than some because I’m one of the few people who brings all of her food from home.  But I can promise you that nothing of mine has every gone bad in the fridge.  I always know exactly what I have and how long it’s been in there.  People take turns cleaning out the fridge every two months or so and there are always so many containers (disposable and non-) of rotten food.  How can you just completely forget a whole or even half of a meal?  And not recognize your container?  What do their fridges look like at home?!  Mine isn’t pretty, but it’s not full of rotten things usually.
3. Unless your breakfast/lunch must be taken at an exact time, or you are so busy that you only have this moment to spare, come back in a few minutes if someone in there is trying to prep their food.  Our lunches are loosely scheduled, but many people don’t eat during their lunch hour – and most people aren’t constantly busy – so there should only be 1 person in the kitchen at a time.  The worst offenders in our office are people who can always make their food at any time and aren’t always busy (the same as me).  If I walk out of my office to head to the kitchen and I hear someone in there, I turn back around and try again in 3-5 minutes.  There are only two counter areas, and if you’re standing on the left, you’re blocking the silverware, toaster oven, and microwave.  If you’re standing on the right, you’re blocking the paper towels, dishwasher, and plates/bowls (the sink is in the middle).  So if someone is making their lunch and you come in the kitchen, they are going to be blocking something that you need and you’re going to have to keep asking them to move, or reach over their food and be rude.  Just come back in a few minutes!  I purposely get my food at off-times when I know others aren’t usually preparing their food.  Yet today, when I was making my lunch at 2:15, two people “joined” me in the kitchen to get their food/snacks and were in my way (or vice versa) the whole time.  Sure, I make elaborate lunches sometimes, but I can’t just eat a sandwich for lunch because of my gluten allergy- give me 5 minutes, tops – and only that much if I’m heating something up.
4. Don’t comment on everything that someone eats or every food scent that you smell.  Maybe I’m just being weird about it, but I hate it when people are all up in my food business.  It’s one thing if they see it and say “that looks good”, but when they come out of their way to see what I’m eating or ask me a million questions, or have comments other than “that looks good”, I can’t stand it.  Don’t crane your neck to see when everyone walks past you with food, and don’t be like “is that_____?” and say something super random like “is that ice cream?” when it’s 8:30 in the morning and I eat Greek yogurt almost every morning.
5. If you take the last “real” paper towel (not counting the one that’s glued to the roll and never peels off right), replace the roll.  We don’t even have to buy these and they are always under the counter.
6. Don’t scoop from the ice bin with your hands or dirty cups.  I’ve seen this.  And we have an ice scoop.
7. The dishwasher….oh my goodness….it’s frustrating.  I admit that I’m kind of a dishwasher Nazi and no matter who I’ve lived with, I always reorganize things when I think they can fit better – but that’s not the issue here (I recognize that’s its my own neurosis).  There are worse violations going on at work.  First off, if you ever put something in there, even just a spoon, take the time to run it and/or unload it every now and then.  Like even once every two months.  There are only two people in our office who regularly start our dishwasher (we need to run it twice a week), and there’s like one and a half people who will unload it.  To be honest, I don’t usually unload it.  For one thing, I start it the night before 90% of the time.  And the second reason is that I don’t usually go into the kitchen until after 9 a.m. (see rule number 3).  But people will honestly (and regularly) go in the kitchen first thing in the morning, see that the dishwasher is clean, and put their dirty dishes in the sink, instead of taking 4 minutes to unload it.   I can guarantee that everyone in my office has 4 minutes to spare in the morning.
8. Dishwasher part two.  Silverware.  If you jam all of the silverware in the first section of the silverware bin because you are too lazy to lower the door and pull out the shelf, the silverware isn’t going to get clean, and you are an asshole.  If you toss your silverware towards the back sections because you are too lazy to lower the door and pull out the shelf, it end ups laying horizontally on top or jamming diagonally in the section and blocking it for other people, and you are still an asshole.  Lower the door, pull out the bottom rack, and place your silverware in the least full compartment.
9. Dishwasher part three.  Top rack.  If you place your containers right side up, the inside isn’t going to get clean.  It’s going to fill with dirty water.  Even worse if you stack one container inside the other and have them right side up (away from the spray), neither are going to get clean.  I seriously confronted someone about this once.  I knew they were his bowls, so I asked him (lightly, not angerly) how they were supposed to get clean if the spray of water couldn’t get inside.  He claimed he did that all the time at home and they got clean (to which I responded, “you aren’t at home, hahaha”) – but I’ve never seen them stacked like that again, so I suspect he knew they weren’t going to get clean but didn’t feel like moving things around to make them both fit that day.
10. Dishwasher part four.  Bottom rack.  This one is simple.  Don’t place your plates horizontally between two different slots when it’s just as easy to place them straight in slots that line up.  When you put them in diagonally, you take up two spaces and someone has to move your dirty plate to make theirs fit.  It really is simple.

I recognize I’m kind of picky and you may think some of these rules are too particular, but these things are pretty simple and courteous when you’re sharing a kitchen with coworkers.  Can you think of anything else to add?

Are you an offender of any of the above?  If so, don’t worry about it – just do better.  Boof doesn’t have good kitchen courtesy either (and she wants to live in the dishwasher).  I promise that her bowl and mat started out perfectly straight before this meal.  She eats like a farm animal.